On-Call #1

This past Monday was my first solo on-call. That meant that I had the on-call pager for a 24 hour period (well, it was actually about 20 hours because in the morning, we still had some orientation stuff to do). But by about 6pm, no other chaplains were in the hospital (Rush has over 600 beds). Needless to say, I was a little anxious and totally freaked out. Though I did have my supervisor's phone numbers and she told me it was perfectly fine to call.

Page went off for the first time not five minutes after I got it. Went and spoke to a patient and family about a Durable Power of Attorney. Any DPOA requests are handled by a chaplain.

Shortly thereafter, I was paged to sit in on a meeting with a family about removing life support from their loved one.

Then I was paged for a regular patient visit.

I got several other pages that I do not remember now.

At some point, I got a page for a Code Blue, but by the time I got to the first floor, a nurse told me everything was fine.

I got a page for a heart attack in the ED. But there was no family and patient couldn't communicate, so she told me not to come.

I got a page for a patient death. We are paged for every death. 1) because it makes sense to have a chaplain, religious-y person when a person had died. and 2) there is a form that has to be filled out, and we are the ones who fill it out.

At 2:30 am, I got a page for another patient death.

At 6:00 am, I got a page for a DPOA.

At 8:17 I got a Code Blue page. By this time I was already in the office and Karen offered to take care of it since I had to do the on-call report. Thank you, Karen! :)

During this night, I slept at the hospital. Very briefly, but I slept. There is a chaplain on-call room in the hospital, outfitted with a computer, television, desk, bathroom, and...you guessed it - a hospital bed! I think maybe I slept two hours total. In addition to waking up the the pager, and not being able to sleep because of anticipation of the pager, I was also awoken twice by a floor cleaner and at least once by beeping from the hall that sounded like a carbon monoxide detector dying. I know what that sound is because my detector at home jsut did that.

All in all, I survivede the night. After I gave my report the next morning, I ended with "And that was my first on-call." Everyone there (other chaplains/staff) clapped for me. January 30 will be my next on-call. Which should be really interesting because that is also the first day of classes for Spring Semester at LSTC.

CPE Orientation and Stuff

The above picture is Rush University Medical Center. The building on the left is the new hospital, the Tower. This medical campus is where I will be for approximately 40 hours a week until mid-March.

CPE for me began on Wednesday, January 4, 8:30 am. Most of weeks 1 and 2 were orientation, and parts of week 3 will be as well. There are three students in my CPE group, me, Nick and Mike. Mary is our supervisor.

Before beginning CPE, many people told me that orientation weeks would be exhausting. I didn't really believe it could be THAT tiring....but I was wrong. Many days, I came home at 5:00...and promptly took a nap. Talking on the phone was a challenge for a few days...I kept leaving words out of sentences.

This is not to say anything negative about the experience, just that it has been tiring. Made all the more tiring on Tuesday/Wednesday. I got to the hospital at about 8:00 on Tuesday morning. I left the hospital at 2:30 Wednesday afternoon. I had just completed my first on-call, shadowing one of the staff.

When one is on call at Rush, it begins with accepting the on-call pager at 8:30 in the morning. You are responsible for taking care of (or referring if appropriate) any pages that come through until 8:30 the next day, when someone else takes the pager. The night I shadowed, we received several calls for visits - patients just wanting a chaplain to come talk to them. We received a call to do a DPOA, a Durable Power of Attorney. At Rush, any request for a DPOA, or even a request for information regarding one, is taken care of by a chaplain. After doing all of those things, and having dinner, we went back to the on-call room. The on-call room is a dorm-like room where the on-call chaplain stays overnight. There is also a bathroom and a second room with a bed. The second room is sometimes used by us and sometimes used by other departments as an on-call room. Pat was the chaplain I shadowed and I actually had a really good time with her. She gave me lots of practical advice...and I gave her some hints on speeding up computer work. ;) We had some good conversation. We went to bed about 2:15 in the morning. She got a code blue (patient stopped breathing or heart stopped) page at 4:30. She called and the nurse said they would call back when family were on their way. Got the phone call at 5:00. We got to the patient's room by about 5:30. The patient died about 5 minutes after we got there. So we stayed with the family, filled out paperwork, got them parking passes, and they left about 2 hours later. We then finished our charting, went back to the room, and got our stuff to be at On Call Report at 8:30. Which is kind of self-explanatory. The on-call person(s) tell everyone else in the department (well, whoever happens to be there) what happened in the last 24 hours.

We have also gotten lots of food these past weeks. One person said that at Rush, CPE actually stands for "Chaplains Perpetually Eating." Fine with me!

We have learned how to do charting of every visit.

We have learned what the Ethics consultation service does.

We have learned what Living Wills, Durable Powers of Attorneys, and the Health Care Surrogate Act are.

We have learned that we need to figure out what, theologically, we are ok with doing. They have told us several times that we will never be forced to do anything against our beliefs....but that we may need to make it happen. I.e. Jewish rabbi was asked to do a baptism. Not in his beliefs. He doesn't do it. Instead, he facilitates it and has the father do it. Things like that.

We have visited the morgue.

We have learned how to use pagers. And I noticed today that our names have finally been changed from last quarter's interns!

We have learned many other things, but some of them have slipped my mind. Information overload. But, not to worry, we have a binder with cheatsheets.

I learned that I really like cheeseburgers and fries from the cafeteria. And that the cafeteria is the cheapest (and is actually reasonable) place to eat in the hospital.

I visited my first patient on a 'cold call' yesterday. I know that sounds bad, but it's what it is. You just walk into a room to talk to a patient with no knowledge of them whatsoever. I got kicked out. Not rudely, but I got kicked out. We were told this would happen and that we need to respect that. We are the only professionals that a patient can kick out of the room - they can't really kick their doctors or nurses out. It's one of the few things they still have control of. So if they want us out, we should get out.

I talked to another patient today, and it went much better. He wanted information about a DPOA.

Sunday there is going to be a memorial service. This is held quarterly for all of the patients who have died in the last quarter. I am participating in it and am reading the Lord's Prayer.

Monday will be an interesting day.

I am on call.

By myself.

13 Hours

In 13 hours, my 400 hour unit of CPE will start at Rush University Medical Center. I am actually kind of excited about it. And completely terrified. I had to go today to do some paperwork. And I have to do a second TB test. I had one done in Louisville last week, but apparently, if you do the skin test, Rush has to see two, at least a week apart. Yeah, me.

But I got to talk to a few current residents/interns today and they were both very positive. One of them told me I would love it and that the program at Rush is very good. And that everyone is very supportive of each other. She also said that after orientation, I will be completely exhausted because there is so much information.

Christmas Break

I did it! I survived my first semester of seminary!! The last day of the semester was December 9. I turned in my final paper on the 10th and met with my Learning Partner and had lunch with her and one of my roommates before I came home. I stopped at Seymour for a while and then came to Louisville.

Last Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday and Saturday mornings I worked at Target. At midnight. Was supposed to be 4, but they decided we needed to have midnight shifts all week to get everything caught up. Yay paycheck!

Monday Rebecca and I had dinner with Pastor and Margaret. It was a wonderful evening of talking about school and stuff and hearing about things I can look forward to in the pastor world. :)

All of my grades were finally posted yesterday (some were posted earlier). I took all of my classes pass-fail and I passed all five of them! Even Greek!!

My CPE unit will start on January 4. I have been emailing the pastoral care department assistant - there is lots of paperwork and such I have to fill out first. I also have to have a TB test done, which I will do here next week. Also got an email with CPE information. In a typical CPE unit, the fewest students it can have is 3 and the most is 6. There is going to be 3 in my group. I'm not sure if the small size is a good thing or a bad thing. The other two are already ordained.

Well, I guess that's all at the moment. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! if I don't post before then! :)

CPE

CPE. Clinical Pastoral Education. Required of all M.Div students in the candidacy process of the ELCA (and many other denominations)

CPE is a 400-hour process where we learn about ourselves. We also learn how to give pastoral care. We learn about ourselves as pastoral caregivers. Most Lutheran people choose to do their CPE unit as a full-time unit during the summer between years one and two of seminary. I am not 'most people' in this situation. I am choosing to do mine during the school year.

My original reason for choosing the school year plan was determined by my first choice of CPE sites. Here in Chicago, there is what is called the Urban CPE Consortium. This is a group of about a dozen social service agencies and you can do a unit of CPE through it. They have an intensive summer unit, but I am going to be at home in the summer, not in Chicago, so that nixes that idea. They have an extended unit that runs from about September to April. I did not consider that as an option because they also have an extended unit that runs from January - April. That was where and when I was going to do CPE. I took five classes this semester so that I would still get nine classes in this year. With extended units, you are not supposed to take a full load. At the beginning of the year, I sent the supervisor an email, telling her I was interested in the Winter/Spring unit and what was the application deadline? She responded that they were not certain they were going to do that unit this year, but they probably would, and if I sent my materials in by early to mid November, that should be fine. So I didn't think much of it until we had our CPE meeting on campus in early October and I started my applications. I mailed it to Urban CPE. She received it. She informed me that they had decided not to do that unit.

Crap. Now what am I going to do? I am interested in working in the social service arena. That was no longer an option. I have been insane this entire semester with an overload for the sole purpose of being able to do CPE next semester. So, I started looking into more traditional CPE sites. I applied for one within walking distance of school. The options would have been a retirement home setting or a hospital setting. I interviewed with them. The interview went very well. There were 8 applicants for 6 positions. I was not one of the ones chosen.

I inquired about several hospital programs. Most of them responded that they either didn't offer a unit in my time frame (even though websites indicated they did) or they were already full. I applied at a Hospice organization. Their extended unit started in March and ran to the end of August. That defeats my purpose of finishing it before May ends.

I applied to a hospital. She called me and said that while her unit would not work for me, another hospital in the same organization had one that would. She was very excited and said based on my application materials, she would have loved to have worked with me. She contacted the other hospital. I contacted the other hospital. I had an interview at the other hospital.

It was the most awful, horrendous, terrible interview I have ever had in my entire life. They would ask me Question A. I would answer Question A. Then they would say "Well, we really were looking for Answer B." (why did they not ask me Question B, then?) So then I answered Question B. They did not like my answer to Question B. The interview was awkward because I met with the supervisory student (one who is trainign to be a CPE supervisor), the CPE supervisor at that particular hospital. And the supervisor over all of the hospitals in that organization. He was present. On a computer screen. Via skype over a crappy internet connection! I had no warning of this until I was walking into the interview room and the student told me "We're trying out new technology" - I did not take that to mean it was part of the interview!

Anyway. The interview was very confrontational. And redundant. The guy via skype asked me the same question, in the same manner, about 5 times. About 1/2 way through, I had the very strong urge to just say "It is clear that you do not like me. I'm not feeling real good towards you, can I just leave now?" But I didn't and I survived the interview.

Maybe experiences from hell are to prepare us for what is coming next.

A few days after this interview, I received an email from the last place I had any possiblity of working my schedule into. I had alerted them that I had to be in class on Monday and Wednesdays and would thier unit still work for me. She emailed me and said I would have to make up the time, but that there were several options for that and yes, it could be worked out! From her initial email, I had a good feeling towards her and a positive attitude toward the site (even though it is a hospital and that just makes me nervous!)

She initially wanted to interview me on Dec. 12. Well...I'll already be in Louisville in that time, but I said that if that was the only option, I would work it out to be there. She instead worked it into her schedule that I could come yesterday, Wed. Dec. 7.

I had to miss Pastoral Care class to go. But, because I had never missed it and especially because my instructor is the Field Ed director, I figured she would understand, which she did. I met at 2:30 with a current CPE student for an hour. She gave me a tour of part of the hospital. We didn't spend too much time touring, however, because in January, most of the current hospital is moving to the new hospital and so nothing will be the same, anyway. We spent most of the time talking in the food court place.

She was a retired woman who had been in business most of her life and after retirement, decided to do some CPE. She absolutely loves her current work! It was impossible not to see her enthusiasm and get drawn into it. She was clear that CPE was a challenge, often difficult and draining. But she could not have hid her positive attitude for it if she had tried. She was also very clear that everyone at the hospital was very nice and helpful, and no one would be annoyed or bothered with any question that is asked of anyone. I was feeling very positive about the experience. As part of our tour, she showed me the on-call room, where the oncall chaplain hangs out/sleeps. The intern who was on call was there. She just graduated from LSTC and actually still lives in student housing - in my courtyard!! (which means I could get to her apartment without leaving my locked 'yard')

Then I interviewed with the woman who will be supervising the unit that starts in January. It was an hour of having a great conversation. Some of her questions were similar to what I had been asked last week. But because the atmosphere was so much less confrontational and more friendly, and I had had a week to ponder those types of questions, I felt that I gave much better, thoughtful, and honest answers than last week. Before I even left, she asked me how long it would take me to respond to a letter of acceptance and a few minutes later, she told me she was going to send me one! So from January 3 - March 15 (or maybe a bit later to make up my missed time), I will be a full-time CPE intern at Rush University Medical Center.

Two More Weeks!

In two weeks, my first semester of seminary will be over. My how time flies!!! I spent a great Thanksgiving week at home, split between Louisville and Seymour. I worked four mornings at Target. I ate at Texas Roadhouse with Rebecca. I had good conversations with Pastor and other church friends. I ate lots of food. I played (and lost) a game of cards. I went shopping for 14 hours, thus staying awake for 24. I celebrated my mom's birthday with Longhorn Steakhouse, casino and food.

And I did approximately 1/2 hour of school work. Oops. I brought an entire bag home with me. Should have saved the energy of toting it around, since that's basically all I did with it.

But I did get everything done that I needed to get done before break. I got my Pentateuch draft done, and my prof and TA made some suggestions, but nothing that is going to make me scrap the entire paper. I got both my pastoral care papers done. I wrote my history paper. I passed my Greek quiz.

I also had my CPE interview. It went very well, but I did not get into that program. There were 8 applicants for 6 positions and they picked the ones that would work best together. In CPE, it's not just that you'll be good for the job, but they also want to make sure the whole group will work well together.

So today I am back in classes. Pentateuch was kind of interesting today. Our class had a joint class session with Systematic Theology. We sat on one side of the table, they sat on the other and we discussed why bad things happen to good people and why good things sometimes happen to us. It was a good class, though it was a challenge to hear our partners accross the table - since there were about 30 people in the room talking at the same time. But one of my partners told me that what I said was really good.

I then went to the blood drive that was on campus. Almost got rejected for a fast heart rate but the second time was ok. I then met with the Field Ed director. She basically told me what I already knew - that I need to re-contact the people who I haven't heard from and if nothing happens, to consider doing CPE during the summer.

But then after Greek, I had a voicemail from one of those contacts, wanting to interview me tomorrow morning. So I'll need to leave Church History early, but I am going to interview at 11. I hope it goes well and that my classes that I still need to take do not cause a problem. She said there is one spot left for the Winter/Spring unit.

I also went to Five Guys with a classmate today. Good food, good times, good conversation. :)

Busy Days Ahead!

Today is Friday. I think. Yes, yes it is Friday. November 11. Veteran's Day. My dad's Birthday.

And day 1 of a 3 day study blitz. I'm somewhat of a procrastinator.

Well, that's not even really it. I have procrastinated. But I've procrastinated because I didn't have time to be proactive. That means I didn't procrastinate, doesn't it?

Yes, I'm rambling and making no sense. For any of you who are thinking of seminary, I urge you...do NOT take 5 classes in your first semester if one of them is Greek.

Don't get me wrong. My extra class is great. It's actually my favorite. And that instructor is now my advisor. But Greek takes so much TIME. I finally just finished my FINAL Greek assignment. YAY!!

The next days are not going to be happy days for me. Monday I have CPE Interview!! It is at a retirement home about a mile or so down the street from LSTC. I hope it goes well and that their time frame works for me. I want to start approximately January 16 and finish before the semester ends on May 11. I'll have to wait and see.

Tuesday I have a 15+ page history paper due. I could have probably made my life easier and done a project instead of a paper. But I'm not really a project person. I'm a paper person.

Tuesday I also have a Greek quiz. I really need to study my vocab words.

Wednesday I have a 15+ page Pentateuch 2nd draft of a paper due. I have a 8+ page Verbatim due in Pastoral Care. I have a 2 page reflection paper due - but I have nearly an entire book to read before I can reflect on it.

Thursday I will be happy. After Greek. In Greek I might not be happy because we will get our quiz back. But I will be done at 2:15 and then I will be on Thanksgiving Break!

Of course, during Thanksgiving Break, I will need to do the final draft of Pentateuch. I will need to do my 8+ page final Pastoral Care paper. I will need to do my 15+ page Christian Social Thought paper (a paper I am very excited to do - writing about women's suffrage and gay marriage!!) I will need to write two 5 page History reflections (after either going to a church service or reading book(s)). I will need to retake my History midterm that did not go as well as I would have liked. I will need to write a 5 page Social Thought presentation, which requires reading the book first. I am also going to work at Target for three days and spend time with family and friends.

I'm tired just writing about everything I need to do. But I will survive. And then the semester will be over. And then I can do it all over again. I will only have three classes in Spring semester, but I am also (hopefully!!!) doing my CPE - which will require 25+ hours a week.

Which reminds me - registration for next semester was on Thursday. Assuming that I do not need to change things around for CPE, I will be taking a Leadership class - Building an Inclusive Church for JTerm. Spring term will be Lutheran Confessions, Worship and Life and Letters of Paul. I'm taking Paul online so that I have fewer class hours...again trying to prepare for CPE.

Registration was kind of interesting....I was assigned an advisor when I first got here. I've been trying since about the second or third week of classes to set up a time to meet with her. She either never responded to my emails or, like she did during Reading Week, emailed me at 9:30 and asked if I could meet with her at 11:30...the same day....of our off week so I wasn't even in Chicago. Anyway, I finally decided that I would just find another one. So I did. My Christian Social Thought professor. I can already tell that this is going to be SO MUCH BETTER! Anyway, because of that, my original advisor had to sign the advisor change form, but they told me it woudln't be processed before registration so she also had to clear me for registration (something I did not know they had to do). But when I got online before registration, my advisor HAD been changed. So then I was afraid that my new advisor didn't know and hadn't cleared me. But it all worked out and I registered for classes at 12:04 am on Thursday morning. I so don't see what is so wrong with walking an actual sheet of paper to the registrar. I guess staying up to the wee hours is better?!?!

So...that's my life in a nutshell right now.