Videotaping

There now exists a video of me reading the gospel and presiding at Eucharist.  No, I'm not just really self-centered and thought it would be fun.  Quite the contrary.  It was a required assignment for Worship class.  We got into groups and had to prepare a worship service.  Each person was videotaped twice - once as presiding minister, once as assisting minister.  We had to chant the Dialogue and the Proper Preface.

I hate my recorded voice.  If I actually sound like that, I wonder why anyone ever puts up with listening to me.  I'm not fond of having my picture taken...thus videotaping is even worse.  I have only sung a solo once.  It was for an elementary school singing contest.  A bunch of other students sang solos and there was also a contest for band members.  A bunch of us went.  A I was the highest score you could get.  Every single person who went that day, singing or playing an instrument got a I.  Except for me.  That kind of ruined me on the whole singing by myself thing (well, actually singing in public in general).

Thus, I was really not looking forward to being videotaped chanting prayers.  Suprisingly, though, two weeks ago when we had a singing workshop in class, the leader pointed to me and I immediately sung without hesitation.

So then we had to do this videotaping.  We spent about an hour and a half last Friday.  There were four of us in my group and our professor was there.  He provided some piano music at certain points in the service.  The tech guy came and set up the camera.  I was the last one to be Presiding Minister.  I read the gospel.  I sang the Dialogue and other parts of the communion liturgy.  We did the post-communion prayer and sending.

I thought we would be set free.

No such luck.  I should have known better.  We were scheduled for three hours and the taping took less than two.  After we were done recording, our professor said "Ok.  Let's take a 10 minute break and meet up in room 207."

Crap.  We're gonna watch them.

We went up to the classroom, and sure enough, the projection screen was down and the tech guy was setting up the computer.  We watched the videos.  Watched mine last.

I was completely surprised.  I did not hate it!  I should have projected more (imagine that, me needing to project??), but I could hear myself.  And my singing, though definitely not show-quality, didn't suck.  We talked about it for about 10 minutes.  A comment made by a classmate was that during the singing, even though I didn't quite have the tune all the time, I kept going and no one would have known any different.  I.e. I didn't pause, laugh, or try to fix it, I just went with it.

A comment from my professor was about my reading of the gospel.  He said that when he'd been listening, he'd been thinking "this is going really well - why is that?"  He said he thought about it and it was because there is something about my 'gentle demeanor' that "makes us feel comfortable and trusting in your reading."  On the grade sheet, he wrote that I "have a fine, warm presence."

I think I am hearing these types of comments enough (trusting, calm, warm - I've heard them in previous jobs and in CPE) that I am actually starting to believe that that may be one of my finest gifts.

Doesn't mean I want to be videotaped again anytime soon, though.